The past few weeks, I have fallen asleep with the song Awesome GOD in my head. Keeps playing on repeat. Last night, as it hit the part about His reigning from Heaven above, I pondered the closeness of GOD.
Sometimes, we think that GOD is far off, that He is not in the trenches with us. Nothing could be further from the truth.
For years, I have battled trauma and shame and fear and crippling loneliness. I use the present verb tense because I still struggle with all those things. I have not arrived, but GOD keeps reminding me of His Presence, His Power, His Love.
It took serious prayer and listening and weeping to know that in my darkest hours, the moments when I felt MOST alone, my Heavenly Father was right there. He never left me.
Be strong and of a good courage. Do not fear nor be afraid of them. For Jehovah your God is He who goes with you. He will not fail you nor forsake you.
Deuteronomy 31:6 MKJV
Even lately, I feel alone and lost. As I sat in prayer yesterday, reflecting upon the Psalms, I realized that GOD is here. I cried so many tears and He is collecting them. He is collecting every tear that falls from my eyes. He knows every star by name. He knows how many hairs are on my head. He knows when I dyed my hair, when I bleached it, and when I finally decided to accept my natural hair color.
He speaks softly, “I love you. You are mine.”
This is not the movie line “You are mine to toy with…” NO! Absolutely not.
This is a loving Father saying, “You are my child. You are my planned creation. You are my joy. You are the apple of MY eye. I love you more than you can even begin to imagine. I see you. I love you. You are mine.“
Can you imagine facing every day with a love like that? Might be a bit easier. Might be wonderful.
So, I encourage you to think about love and how perfect love only exists in the God Head. The earth cannot fill you. But, Jehovah, the God of all creation can.
Finding Purpose 
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